Book of Jobin 2:8

A Massive door swings open and Von Ryan, Von Harris and Recalsatrix wearily stumble thought the threshold.

"Fear not,"shouts Von Ryan. "You are all safe now."

A short man with a strange hair cut wearing the red tunic or a monk scurries out of the shadows, "Close the doors, quickly before the giant spiders over take the monastery!"

"Fear not good sir we have defeated all the giant spiders, burned their egg sacs and slashed down their webs, they shall never plague mankind again," answers Von Harris.

"Quickly barricade the doors before they return," shouts the short monk.

The man pushes past them and barricades the door with a large piece of wood.

"Follow me to the central hall we should be safe there," he says as he beckons them down a dark corridor.

As the men enter the massive hall the short monk leads them aside to a row of statues. "here is what the spiders are after, I have protected these artifacts for decades," says the man pointing to a carefully crafted statue adorned in gold and jade.

"What fine work," exclaims Von Harris.

"Fool you must be blind the true artifacts are hidden behind these worthless stones," the man then reaches behind a statue and pulls out a metallic object. "Behold the holy of holies an item so powerful it can make peoples heads burst in to flames simply from thinking about it."

"But sir that looks to be nothing more than an old cheese..." remarks Recalcartix.

"Fool, how dare this was sent to me by Gartaou the god of life and death, and it is both holy and ancient," interrupts the monk.

The men stare in confusion.

"Your minds are too feeble to comprehend I shall place the item here on this pedestal where it will be safe and it's holyness can not be desecrated."

the short man shuffles to his side, "Perhaps this next item will make you believe." he reaches behind another statue, "before you gaze on this item you should be warned my brother Joben's head exploded when he gazed at this item for only a moment."

He pulled out a length of fabric and waved in the air.

"Sir, that is clearly a scarf," proclaimed Recalsatrix.

"No, it is very ancient and very holy, in fact I shall put it back so you bothersome heathens cannot sully its holiness."